Going Away

Tuesday evening we went to Meklit's orphanage for her going away party. I was hoping it would be with all of the kids - both young and old, but it was such short notice that they could only have the younger kids and a few of Meklit's older friends.

It was still really good. Lots of singing and praying by the kids, and snacks and my first and only (so far) coffee ceremony.
It was obvious that the house mothers really love these kids, and it is a mixed bag of emotion when they are leaving. Like Denise told me a few weeks ago, it is so wonderful to see them doing well at home, but also hard to see them leave.

This is Hanna clapping with the white wrap on her head, and she is amazing. Such love for the kids, and this fun, playful, affectionate relationship with each of them. She got really emotional when it was time for us to go, and I said I would be back to visit her again. Last time I was there and she was taking a number of kid's temps with an under the arm thermometer I told her I would try to bring her something quicker. I took her a digital one that goes in the ear and she and the nurse were delighted.
The highlight for me was one of Meklit's friends praying over her. I have it on video as well as a number of the songs, so I don't know what she said, but it was so sweet.


After the party we went to see the big kids at the other compound.
They too are a delight, and their singing was beautiful.
The staff person who was with us and took us back to the guest house was very sweet, and very committed to teaching the kids.
She led the songs that she has taught them, and then led prayers for Meklit and our family that were so full of passion and faith. Wow!

Faces

Some of my favorite people...
not all, just some from this last trip...
each is different in their own special way...
precious...

beautiful...

full of life...

sweet...

passionate about our kids...

mine...

too cute to not stop you in your tracks...

all precious in His sight.

Day 2 - Back to Layla

After yet another bad night of sleep in Addis (for me that is, Meklit slept like a baby), Ted, Meklit and I headed to Layla for breakfast again. This morning it was bread with peanut butter and sweet, hot tea. The food is good, but the company is better than can be imagined.

When I had picked up Meklit, Gail recommended that I take her to a hair salon to get her ready for her going away party, and then for the trip home. What Gail hasn't seemed to figure out yet is that she has the best salon in town. I went to Tigist after breakfast and asked if she would braid Meklit's hair for her. She, Tsion and some of the other girls washed, combed out and then braided her hair beautifully. Have I said I adore these girls yet?

They had fun doing what they do best, gabbing, giggling and braiding hair - such a social event for them, and I got to hang out and play with the kids. I got in some b-ball time with some of the younger boys which was lots of fun.

I even sat through an Ethiopian History class with one of the Group 4/5 classes. Julie Hehn is the director of the Layla school, and she has done a wonderful job as have the teachers, and the work these kids do is tough. Not an easy task to teach a group of kids, some of whom will be there a while, and others a very short time. They are doing a great job.

My class time was rewarded by being invited to join the teachers for tea and cookies during break. I can see why this was one of Denise's fun times of the day.

Lunch was sega wat, green beans and more delightful injera. It is so funny to see these kids who do not want to eat ANYTHING green. I think it is universal. Marta is that way, and a bunch of the other older girls too. I thought they were great, and they were not impressed at all. There was one older kitchen mother who was really getting after the kids and making them all take a scoop of beans. Then the other kids who liked them would come later and help the now sad kids by taking them off their plate when grumpy kitchen mother wasn't looking.

We stayed and played through the afternoon, and then got a ride to Meklit's orphanage for her going away party.

First Day In Addis

***Again, this post was written on the trip, just not posted until now with pictures added.***

Without the jitters of meeting Meklit for the first time I thought I would do better, but as soon as I woke up the first time (at 4:30) I was done. My mind started racing about all the other kids I would meet or be reunited with, and there was nothing to do but get up.

I jumped in the shower, met Ted Burton, grabbed a cup of coffee (thanks Salina – she couldn’t sleep either) and then Ted and I headed for Layla. As I told Salina I had already met my kid, so I didn’t have to wait for Gail to come and take me somewhere, so Ted and I went to have breakfast with the kids at Layla.

That is my new favorite place ever to eat breakfast. I finally found out about the bread Marta had been trying to describe, and learned why she likes her tea 2/3 tea 1/3 sugar, which is the way they serve it at breakfast. Or you can have hot milk with lots of sugar some days.

I love to share meals with the kids. It is such a social time, and they are all there, and every meal I sit with a new group so you get a chance to talk to some kids you wouldn’t otherwise. I never want to eat breakfast in Ethiopia anywhere else.

After breakfast I played soccer with some kids, and Ted showed them how to ride his wave board. Think skateboard with only 2 wheels that freespin in any direction and the board has a pivot point in the middle so it twists and turns too. From a non-skater/skier type like me it looks impossible and like many trips to the ER waiting to happen. Needless to say he was a huge hit with the boys.

I was at Layla for ~2 ½ hours before Gail came to bring Salina to meet her little guy, and I rode back to the guest house with them and then on to pick up Meklit from her orphanage. My travel was such short notice that they had their wires crossed, so she had gone to school that day and had to be driven back to meet me. Poor thing had not much time to get ready for me, but she did great.

I met her van and she smiled at me when I called her name, then I swooped her up and smooched both cheeks like I was doing at the end of our last visit. Her smile and giggle told me she didn’t forget either. She changed out of her uniform (rabbit trail here – all the school kids in Ethiopia wear uniforms which are provided by the parents or in this case the orphanage, so why can’t we seem to pull this off in the US?!) and we were off to the guest house to start getting warmed up again.

We were going to go out for lunch, but the guest house cook had the place smelling so good that I couldn’t pass on her mesir wat, potatoes and injera. If you sign up she will make you lunch and/or dinner, and your bill at the end of your stay reflects the meals you eat as well as drinks, etc. Last time I didn’t eat at the guest house at all, but we were so tired and it smelled so good, and she had made enough for all of us, so we stayed in. So good. Nice chewy sour injera. Mmmm…

In the afternoon we hired Dawit to drive us to the Hilton’s Ethiopian Air office to verify our return tickets. If you don’t, chances are your tickets will be cancelled and you will have to buy them for a later flight. Crazy as it sounds, it is Ethiopia. Then we went shopping at 2 different stores, had everything we needed for the trip done, and went back and napped, ate dinner, and went to bed. I was so tired, and Meklit must have been too because she slept for 2 hours in the late afternoon and then slept all night.

The highlights of the day were many. First of all was getting Meklit. She is so shy, and literally won’t say a word to me. She spoke 4 words to me that I remember on my last trip, and I was so shocked that I don’t have the slightest idea what her voice sounds like. I know she understands some English, but she isn’t about to prove it to me.

Then there was meeting the kids I grew to love in December. While all of the kids are wonderful and fun, I really got to know the older ones, mostly the girls who were Marta’s friends and classmates. They were all shocked to see me, and it was fun to see their different reactions. Some were quiet and shy, while others literally jumped into my arms and hugged me for all they were worth.

Also it is always fun to get to know the other families at the guest house, and hear their stories about how we came to be sharing a roof in the middle of Ethiopia. I really hit it off with Ted, and through our conversations of the day we figured out that our stories of building our families through adoption are very similar. His daughter who came home last summer is Meklit’s close friend, and he is here visiting a very sweet 12 year old who is Marta’s friend and will come home soon. Since we live close to each other the girls will have the opportunity to remain close while growing up, and our families will certainly grow closer too. What great people.

Off Again

***This post was written on the trip, just not posted until now, so things are a little out of order - oh well.***

This trip to Addis seems almost surreal. Getting the news on Wednesday, leaving town Friday for an early Saturday flight, there hasn’t really been time to process it all. It seems odd. Part of it must be that this trip is different though. There are no butterflies about meeting Meklit for the first time, because I have already done that. No jitters of the unknown-ness of going to Addis for the first time - been there. I know the guest house, the airport, the restaurants, how to get around, so none of those things need to be worried about.

It felt so strange that I had to send a last minute email to Erin just to make sure that the ticket, passport and money I have with me are really the only things I need. No paperwork, no appointments, nothing. Just pick her up, hang out for a couple days and fly home. I think the only thing scheduled will be her going away party.

I am sitting in the airport in Washington DC waiting another 3 hours for the flight from here to Addis to leave. I have a fresh outlook on flight lengths, so the trip here from Portland seems like a hop rather than a long flight. Maybe it is all perspective because my rear end didn’t even get sore. If only I could say that after this next flight.

I sat next to a Dr. from a Christian medical relief agency on the way here from Portland. His wife is Ethiopian, from Addis. The regularity that these connections happen doesn’t even surprise me anymore. We had a great conversation once we got over the American habit of not talking to the people sitting next to you. I hate that and regularly practice it at the same time.

Another cool connection is that Ted Burton will be staying at the guest house at the same time I will be there. He is going to be spending time with an older girl at Layla that his family is adopting, but the cool connection is that he is the dad of Meklit’s close friend who went home last summer. They live near Portland, so we can get the girls together, and now they are adopting one of Marta’s friends too, so it will be fun to get to know him.

Last night we drove over to Portland so that this morning’s 5 am trip to the airport didn’t have to start at 3, and everyone has so much fun playing in the pool. Playing hard is a good way to start a week away from Lisa and the kids. Protect them while I am gone Lord.

Home With Meklit

Meklit and I got home late last night. What ever you do, if you can avoid a 3 day stay in Addis do it. The trip there, 3 long days to try and do what you want, followed by the trip home is just about enough to kill you.

This is a picture of 2 of Marta's close friends, Tsion and Rahel, and Meklit, a newer girl Maria and I in "J" class hanging out. Then picture of Meklit and Rahel. These older girls are just so amazing, and really adore Meklit. They took her everywhere with them while we were at Layla.

We had a great time, spent almost all of our time at Layla with the kids, and had a completely awful, emotional time leaving. I was a wreck and wanted to take so many home with us, but couldn't this time. I did tell them that I would be back though...

In a few days...

In a few days this is where I will be. This is a photo of the SW corner of Addis Ababa where the AAI guest house, Layla House, and Little and Big AHOPE are. Simply put, it is one of my favorite places on the planet.

In this area of that city there are few beautiful vistas or amenities that would earn a city in the US spots on any top 10 lists. By our standards it is a poor area of a poverty stricken city. But it is still one of my favorite places on the planet.

Right now it is up there because one of my 7 year old daughters lives there, but that will change in one week. It will still be high on my list after we are home because of the beautiful people that will still live there, not just at AHOPE and Layla, and because God has woven this place and those people into my spirit.

If you want to know where we will be, click on the picture to open it larger on your screen. Layla House is the push pin up in the upper right corner, and is the buildings with the blue roofs. Just to the left of it across the road and below the big section of trees is where the guest house is, and Little AHOPE is over on the left side of the picture (which is from Google Earth by the way).

On Google Earth I have tried for months to make out Meklit or Marta or any other kids I know, but of course this is just too much detail to hope for. But that never stopped me from stopping by to check it out anyway.

Exhale...

Finally able to breath out (as in I have been holding my breath for a long time now) we can happily say that Meklit's waiver is done, and we can now bring her home. There are no appointments or forms or fees or hoops to jump through, just come get her. So, I leave this Saturday the 10th, will have her on Monday, and we fly back out on Wed the 15th returning to Portland on the evening of the 16th. It makes it only a 3 day stay in Addis, which is about a year less than I would prefer, but with work and the ability to get on planes it was either now or the end of the month, so here we go again.

Now to the packing.

Our Sweet Girl

It has been nearly 2 months since we left Meklit, and I am thinking that in the next couple weeks we will get word that I can go and bring her home.

That is the very glass is half full side of me talking, but it sounds really good to me. We were thinking all along that it would be about 2 months, and have been praying it would be no more than that, so we are ready God - just have them give us a call...

Konjo

One way beautiful ferenge bride + one habesha daughter with mad braiding skills = one very konjo wife!

Undoubtedly the envy of this small town atleast.

I keep telling Marta that for a few $$ per head this could be her college money, but she doesn't seem to get it yet.

Are You Sure?

Our friends the Hehn's have a family line that goes something like "are you kidding me or just joking" that originated with one of their Ethiopian kids and an early struggle with some Americanisms in the English language. If you hang out with them you will hear it, but it is an inside joke.

When Marta first came and started to warm up to us and become playful, someone would say something to her and she would say "are you sure?" Like when a friend came over and they were looking through Jeff's yearbook. The friend pointed to the picture of herself and told Marta "that is me." Marta said, "are you sure?"

Now this has become the saying around here. Nothing like a well placed "are you sure" during dinner conversation to have everyone rolling.

Guess you had to be there...

Ciao Denise

It is a dark day for me, and I assume many of us AAI and Layla House parents. Denise is no longer in Ethiopia, but back in the US in Portland.

My daily obsession of checking for updates, hoping to hear a word about Marta or Meklit at first, and my not so obsessive looking for stories about the kids I know and love who are still there will now sadly come to an end. Maybe like a favorite book I will go back and reread it all one more time.

If you don't know what I am talking about, Denise Baker was a volunteer at Layla House since last June, and wrote a blog about her experiences. Go here to check out The Last Post. Her words were a lifeline for Lisa and I during our wait.

Thank you again Denise for loving our daughters and so many other children over that past 8 months. I know they love you as deeply as you love them, and we appreciate every moment of your efforts. There is always room for you in our home. Ciao...

Discomfort

Since I got back from Ethiopia I have been in a funk. Can't really explain it, or express my feelings and thoughts about it, because I don't really understand it all.

Much of it I write off to the burdens and stress of my life right now, which is just a temporarily abnormal amount. It will go away with time.

But one of the issues I know I have been stewing on (I am a crock pot kind of guy) is my reaction to Ethiopia, to Addis Ababa, to Layla and to AHOPE. I still can't put my finger on it and really talk about it, but today I read a post by a family who is adopting from Liberia, and who spent 5 weeks there. Even through my fog of understanding this jumps out as clear as day and shouts TRUTH.

So go to The Isaac's Liberian Journey and check out an honest assessment of what it is like to be an American in Liberia, or Ethiopia for that matter.

Even my trip, which I considered minimalistic - staying at the guest house, eating at local restaurants and Layla, and time spent with the kids just wasn't the real thing. I still felt calloused and hardened and utterly without compassion - so far from what I think it truly means to be a follower of Christ.

I specifically remember sitting in the seat of the van with Marta stopped for traffic as we drove through the city. That is when the beggars would come to the windows, and plead for something. I don't know what they were asking for in Amharic, food, or money I assume, but I do know that as I sat there with my daughter, I wanted more than anything for her to know that the heart of her father was good. I sat there with hundreds of US dollars in my pockets so we could eat, and shop, and take things we don't need home with us - so uncomfortable - wondering what her thoughts of the situation and of me were.

I went to Ethiopia, but I made sure to cushion myself and my daughter from reality there. I really do love the people, but I have no idea what their life is really like. I tease Marta all the time about relinquishing me some minor percentage of Habesha status. She relentlessly shakes her head and says no, I am 100% ferenge. She is right.